Introduction

Introduction on listening
Everyone wants fame, fortune, success and admiration from others A leader typically have all these fame, fortune, success and admirations A leader typically speaks very well with words that resonated with many Ironically enough, in order to speak very well, you must first understand your audience…

What you need to know before listening

Common road blocks to listening
We have learned that listening is one of the most powerful and therapeutic skill you have have to help one another As powerful as it may be, as simple as listening sounds, it is actually pretty difficult Here are some of the most common road blocks that stops you from ever achieving a successful l…
Ego, part 1
Ego is the enemy Ego is selfish Ego is not what you want to have at any given time while you listen to others To make it clear on how ego looks like in a conversation, here is an example below Example of ego in conversations boyfriend: “Hey how was your day?” girlfriend: “Oh it was not so good …
Ego, part 2
As we have discussed in part 1, Ego is the enemy Ego is the obstacle to having a great listening session With ego Your partner is lost Your partner won’t feel comfortable to open up to you You must eliminate ego if you want to connect with your partner or loved ones better What can you do It’…
Your advice don’t matter
Suppose Michael was eating lunch with his best friend Sam Sam looked like something was on his mind and was not paying attention in the conversation the conversation at all Michael then started to ask him questions and try to listen, > Michael: “Hey you’re not paying attention to the food at all…
Trust and understanding before all else
We are about to dive in to the more technical section where we will learn how to listen Here are a few beliefs around trust and understanding you need to learn before anything else Greatest human desire is to be understood The most common popular misconception, wrong belief > “You need love to co…

Listening Techniques

Discovery topic questions, part 1
You want to listen and understand the other person However, you don’t know what to talk about That is where the discovery topic questions come in This is the very first technique of listening Purpose The purpose is simple > To gather all emotional topics for you to potentially dive deeper in Ch…
Discovery topic questions, part 2
Remember the goal of discovery topics is to find little nuggets of information about the other person Imagine this process as if you scouting a field looking for potential areas to dig for gold Potential areas to dig for gold are these little nuggets of information about the person Gold is the em…
Pause, the beauty of silence
Pause is a very powerful tool in communication When you speak, the pause builds authority and power When you listen, the pause invites listenees to share something deeper without saying anything Pause creates silence Silence is a beautiful phenomenon With silence, it stills the water in the min…
Dig deeper in conversations with why questions
Most conversations that people have are usually over the surface Some may want to have a deeper connection with someone yet they don’t know how to do it People always value deep conversations Deep conversations is a place where people share more vulnerable parts of themselves with one another Th…

Putting it all together

Summarize what others said
Whenever you are listening to other, it’s very important you show that you are listening If you are doing a terrible job of listening, here are some things you may hear from your frustrated partner or closed ones > “I feel like you are not even listening to me” > “Do you even understand what I sai…
5 Rules using listening techniques
Here are the 5 rules when using listening techniques together: 1. Start with discovery questions To understand and more about someone else you always got to start by ask a few (semi) open ended questions to get started. Simple questions such as “How are you” to your partner and loved ones work.…